今天，给大家带来一个IELTS雅思大作文真题的原创范文。
题目：
Some people think that cultural traditions will be destroyed when they are used as money-making machines aimed at tourists. Others believe it is the only way to save such traditions in the world today. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.
审题：
Type:Discuss & Opinion 讨论+观点(我的观点：agree: making money is a good way, but not the only way)
Body 1: profiting from culture cheapens it and will cause its disappearance
Body 2: locals will preserve their culture because it makes money/education of young is better
Key words: will be destroyed / only way
- Model Answer 高分范文 -
It is believed by some thatthecommercializationofcultural elements geared towardstourism will causetheirdestruction,whereas others feelthisisthesolemethodto help withtheirprotection.This essay shall explore both views; however, in my opinion, I believethistype ofprofiteeringwill result inensuringtheirsurvivalrather than theirruin,though I also think thatthismethod is notexclusive.
One of the main reasons why some feelthe commercialization ofcultural heritagemay eventually lead to thevanishmentof traditionsis thatlocals will beseducedby the idea ofmaking a profit,no matter how thatmoney is made.As such,traditional elements,such asethnicsinging and dancing activities,will eventually becomehollowandshallow,and as a consequence,tourism will graduallydie off,with the final result ofextinguishingthesetraditions.The same could be stated forphysical buildings,wherebyold buildings have beendemolishedsimplyto be replaced byreplicasfocused towards tourists.Thisuse of cultural elements forcommercial ends,consequently,runs the risk ofensuring theirdemise.
Many regions,however, seek tomake a livingthroughshowcasingtheiruniquetraditions tooutsiders,causinglocal citizens of that area to havea vested interest in the continuation oftheir traditional culture,and in turn, helping tosafeguardthe survivalnot just ofthe traditionsbut also theirlivelihoods.Ethnic minorities, for example,continue to survive with their traditionsintact,asit isthe commercial promotion oftheir uniquecultural identitythat attractsonlookersand tourists.Nevertheless, the leastintrusive method topreserve cultural traditionswhile simultaneouslymaintainingtheirintegrityis byinfusingtheschool curriculumwith courses that promote cultural traditions,particularly asthe modern worldallows forall students to use the Internet to easilyengage withculture.
In conclusion,thoughboth arguments areindeedvalid,I think thatthroughthe promotion of culture in school courses, the customs and traditions of a region will be maintained with greaterpuritythan simplythrough selling culturalartifactsto tourists.
- Essay Analysis 范文解析 -
- (1) Introduction
Paraphrasing from the Statement/Question题目改述:
- Some people think that = it is believed by some that
- cultural traditions = cultural elements
- will be destroyed = cause their destruction
- used as money-making machines = the commercialization of
- aimed at = geared towards
- tourists = tourism
Standard Phrase for the “Discuss + Opinion” type essay 讨论+观点类大作文高分句型：
- It is believed by some that
- , whereas others feel
- This essay shall explore both views; however, in my opinion, I believe
- , though I also think that
Words showing Cohesion (C&C)展示“连贯与衔接”的词汇和短语:
- their
- , whereas
- This
- will result in
- rather than
- , though
- also
Vocabulary高分地道词汇和短语：
- commercialization 商业化
- cultural elements 文化元素
- geared towards 面向；着眼于
- profiteering 谋取利益
- ensuring 确保
- survival 生存
- ruin 毁灭
- exclusive 独有的；排他的
- (2) Body 1 -
Aspects that must be referred to 这段需要提到：
profiting from culture cheapens it and will cause its disappearance
Standard IELTS essay phrase雅思高频句型：
One of the main reasons why some feel…is that
Vocabulary and Collocations高分地道词汇和短语：
- cultural heritage 文化遗产；文化传承
- vanishment 消失
- seduced 引诱
- traditional elements 传统元素
- ethnic 具有民族特色的
- hollow 空心的
- shallow 肤浅的
- die off 绝迹
- extinguishing 消灭
- demolished 破坏；毁坏
- replicas 复制品
- commercial ends 商业目的
- runs the risk of 面临……的风险
- demise 死亡
Words Showing Cohesion [Signposting words, conjunctions, relative pronouns] (C&C)展示“连贯与衔接”的词汇和短语：
- lead to
- is that
- by the idea of
- , no matter how that
- As such,
- , such as
- will eventually become
- , and as a consequence
- , with the final result of
- these
- The same could be stated for
- , whereby
- simply
- This
- , consequently,
- (3) Body 2 -
Aspects that must be referred to这段需要提到：
locals will preserve their culture because it makes money/education of young is better
Standard IELTS essay phrase 雅思高频句型：
…, however, …
Vocabulary and Collocations高分地道词汇和短语：
- make a living 谋生
- showcasing 展示
- unique 独特的
- outsiders 外来者
- vested interest in 既得利益
- the continuation of 继续
- safeguard 保护
- livelihoods 生计
- ethnic minorities 少数民族
- intact 完好无损的
- the commercial promotion of 商业推广
- cultural identity 文化身份
- onlookers 观众
- intrusive 侵扰的
- integrity 完整
- infusing 注入
- school curriculum 学校课程表
- engage with 与……交流
Words Showing Cohesion [Signposting words, conjunctions, relative pronouns] (C&C)展示“连贯与衔接”的词汇和短语：
- , however,
- their
- , causing
- , and in turn,
- , helping to
- not just of…but also their
- , for example,
- , as
- Nevertheless,
- the least
- while simultaneously
- , particularly as
- allows for
- (4) Conclusion -
Standard IELTS essay phrase 雅思高频句型：
- In conclusion,
- , I think that
Vocabulary and Collocations高分地道词汇和短语：
- valid 合理的；复合逻辑的
- purity 纯洁
- artifacts 人工制品
Words Showing Cohesion [Signposting words, conjunctions, relative pronouns] (C&C)展示“连贯与衔接”的词汇和短语：
- though both
- indeed
- through
- than
- simply
